it's so flippin' hard

"It's so flippin' hard."  Keri Eckstein, Paris, June 11, 2019, searching on-line for a restaurant with a non-salad, gluten-free option

It is not easy being gluten free. Or lactose free. Or to have a moral compunction against eating mammals -- and other cute animals. Keri is all of the above. She has figured out ways at home to navigate her dietary limitations, through trial and error, and with with minimal linguistic and cultural barriers. We knew it would be different in Europe. Indeed, Keri has spent most meals eating salads, which have ranged from okay to decent. But she has longed to eat something more substantial, something cooked, even.

Combined with Owen's plea to eat a real lunch, we decided on Monday to try Noglu, a gluten-free restaurant about a half-mile from the Louvre, where we had an early afternoon tour. Keri and Lauren went with the vegetarian burger, Owen the hamburger and I tried the fish burger. Owen ate most of his beef patty -- which actually looked pretty appetizing. Keri and Lauren were expecting American-style plant-based patties, but got a whole heaping ton of vegetables on gluten-free buns. Lauren ate almost none of her meal. Wise girl. Keri and I ate, with the benefit of hindsight, more than we should have. And, as we were leaving the restaurant, we independently felt some belly aching. Without going into detail, I'll simply write here that Keri and I were both in desperate need of the Louvre facilities at beginning of our tour. [insert your artistic "relief" joke here]

Things foodwise improved over the next two days. We ate dinner on Monday night at Passamore, a small Italian place in the Montparnasse area. I had hoped they would have gluten-free options. They did not, so Keri was stuck with a salad, albeit a good one. The kids and I each got really outstanding pasta and dessert -- gelato for them and a cafe gourmand por moi. For those not in the know, cafe gourmand is a truly wonderful thing that the French have created. For the price of one regular desert, you can get a cup of espresso and three mini-desserts. Mine included a mini canoli, tiramasu and panna cotta. All delicious, and perfect for the person who cannot make up his mind which dessert to order. This needs to be brought to America. Now.

Today, the other three members of my family enjoyed their individual culinary highlights in Paris. For Owen, it was a lunchtime stop at le golden arches (seen above contemplating how they turn chicken into nugget form). Lauren enjoyed her first crepe -- a sweet chocolate one. And, most important, Keri was able to identify an Italian joint close to us with gluten-free pastas. (Exhale.) Keri ate her pasta arrabiata with a smile (above). And I got a second cafe gourmand. We are finally getting the hang of this Paris food thing, just as it is time to leave.

Louvre. Flora, who showed us the Marais, was an excellent guide at the Louvre, the second largest museum in the world, home to a number of famous pieces. Flora gave us a good history of the building -- from protective fort to royal castle and residence, to museum. She then showed us and helped provide context for a number of important pieces -- Venus de Milo, Winged Victory (aka the Nike statue), and Mona Lisa, to name a few. For a family of art dilettantes like ours, it was extremely helpful to have someone not only place the items in history, but help us understand the particular techniques that were used to make these items, and render them so beautiful.

Statute of Liberty Replica. In 1886, the people of France gave to the United States the Statue of Liberty that sits in New York Harbor. Three years later, the American community of Paris thanked their French hosts by bestowing on them a quarter-size replica that once served as a working model for the real deal. You're welcome, France! For at least the last six years, Owen has mentioned as the primary reason he wanted to come to Paris was to see the "mini Statue of Liberty," as he called it. One malfunctioning commuter rail line, a mile of walking to Ile aux Cygnes, and . . . we did it. 13-year old Owen was not nearly as excited as his younger self would have been, but it was still nice to check that item off the list for our son.

Musee d'Art et D'Historie du Judaisme. On Tuesday, we spent the early afternoon at the Jewish Museum of History and Art, located in the Marais. The museum is well-designed and not overwhelming. It includes a history of the Jewish people in France, from Roman times to the middle ages, from expulsion to emancipation to an influx of Jewish refugees from other parts of Europe. Coming from Ashkenazic and Sephardic traditions, France's Jews have played an important role in the political, social and cultural history of this country after 1789, and this museum does an excellent job of capturing that through narrative explanation and an extensive collection of artifacts. The museum temporarily houses an exhibit on Helena Rubinstein, a Polish-born cosmetics entrepreneur, who spent many years before the Second World War living in France. I knew pretty much nothing about her, and came away impressed what she was able to achieve in a world not so welcoming to women, or Jews.

Musee de l'Armee. Owen came down this afternoon with an acute case of museumitis, manifesting itself through a sore ankle. We dropped him at the flat, and the three of us went to the French army museum, which also houses Napoleon's tomb. The tomb was grand and a bit odd, sitting in a massive hole cut into the floor at then end of a large church. We only saw a small section of the museum, the portion dealing with French military history after 1871. I wished we had more time, as there was so much to see and read. As it was, we were all pretty tired as we made our way through to 1945. I'll note the most interesting part for me was the museum's treatment of the internal French struggle between the Free French and the Vichy regime, which occupied southern France as it collaborated with the Nazis. To my eye, the museum was a bit too generous to Vichy. Easy for me to say as an American born in 1970, I know, but Vichy capitulation in June 1940 left the British all alone, and but for a few historic miracles and strategic blunders, could have remade the European continent for decades to come.

Au revoir, Paris! We head to Amsterdam tomorrow. We have had a truly wonderful time in Paris, and it will be hard to top it. The locals have been extremely nice and patient with us. The buildings and gardens are beautiful. The Metro functions with remarkable efficiency. There is more history and art and culture than just about any place in the world. And the food is, well, tres bien. We feel like we have only scratched the surface here and look forward to returning.